The Potty Day

Mark here.  EmmaLee is too embarrassed to tell the story so it's up to me.  Think of the most embarrassing moment in your entire life.  Does it include bodily functions?  This is the moment to top them all.  EmmaLee's uncle Kay invited us up to his Salt Lake City condo for lunch and visiting with Jeff and Katie and their respective families.  It was in a nice part of Sugar House and we could tell they spent a lot of time working on the food.  We were just getting ready for lunch when I noticed Jared was wet.  He had conquered number 1 but we were struggling with number 2.  This was a complete surprise.  Katie's husband Jason noticed the looks on our faces and figured out what was going on.  He offered a pair of Dallin, his son, shorts.  We gratefully accepted.  Only problem was we didn't bring any spare pairs of underwear.  Oh well, he'll just have to go commando we thought.  After a quick eat Jared headed back for the bedroom to play with the toys Kay has for his grandkids.  Shortly later Abigail came out and said one of the worst things we could have imagined at that moment: "Jared pooped!"  We were mortified.  We ran back to the bedroom to begin the clean up process.  We got paper towels from the kitchen and began picking up the chunks and dropping them into the toilet.  We Jason immediately picked up on what was happening and went to prepare a cleaning solution of water and dish soap (Kay doesn't spend more than a week or two in the place).  After we had picked up all the feces and scrubbed  the floor with the paper towels and soapy water we flushed the toilet.  That's when the horror began.  It didn't flush.  We had a bowl full of crap and no where to go.  EmmaLee looked at me and said "let's go."  I told her it would be more embarrassing if we left without cleaning up.  We grabbed Jason, Mr. Fixit, and explained the problem with the toilet.  He fiddled with the measure and the water began to fill the bowl to its normal level.  We tried flushing again.  This time the water not only rose but didn't stop.  We tried frantically to shut the water off but not until a couple of inches covered the floor.  To make matter worse, there was carpet in the bathroom.  What do we do?  EmmaLee was already horrified and too ashamed to go out and let others know what was going on so it was my duty.  Again, I went out to the rest of the party.  This time I asked Kay for towels he wouldn't mind never seeing again.  For the next 20 minutes we sopped up the floor.  After putting the towels into a plastic bag we went back out.  We were going to put them straight into the washing machine but as luck would have it, there was already a wet load in.  It was that kind of day.

The rest of the afternoon we spent playing ping-pong and pool.  For some reason we really weren't into playing.  When the time came for everyone to leave we made record time and got out of there.  When EmmaLee finally had the courage to tell Kay about it we offered to pay for the carpet cleaning.  Kay, being the gentleman that he is, declined but did say the situation sounded much worse than he was lead to believe.  It could be a while before we have the nerve to go to his house again.